Tesshin opened his talk this week by asking a very simple question: “When working a koan – who do you identify with?”   Do you identify with the master, student, Buddha, a Bodhisattva, or the fish monger?  As we wrestle with that ‘thing’ which cannot be solved, we try on the hat of each role to see if we can gain any clue.  We soon discover that each role has something to teach, but none of them are a ticket to realization.  There is a point where we start questioning who we really are.  It is that exact state of confusion when the real transcendence happens.  Tesshin noted that this is one of the key insights of Koan training.  

 

There is an expression in popular culture – “Code Switching.”  In many ethnic groups, members will talk one way with members, friends, and family and another way with people outside of the group.  We also see this in our workplaces.  Think for a minute on the way you communicate in a business meeting as compared with how you communicate causally.  We quickly and seamlessly switch on the fly depending on the person we are with.  Does this imply that identity is fluid and not fixed?  To students of the Path, this fluidity should not come as a big surprise and we should not be alarmed by this.  Tesshin mentioned that this fluidity and code switching can serve as the beginning of wisdom if taught in the right way.  

(Attached is an interesting article on this behavior ) 

 

As an example, Tesshin raised the example of a video of a woman police officer who broke down at a fast food restaurant because her order delayed.   Tesshin played the video to his children and asked them for their perspective.  As expected, the children related to the officer as the video was told from her point of view and made clear the pressure and sleepless nights she was experiencing.  Tesshin asked the kids to dig a bit deeper, however.  What would the story look like if the person having to wait for the food was a minority patron?  What is the perspective of the fast food workers who are over worked, under paid, and risking Covid infection?  How does perspective change the story?   What was interesting is that the kids became frustrated due to the state of confusion this constant perspective switching caused.  The clear story of a woman’s frustration became unclear and uncertain.  We don’t like this confusion!!  Tesshin was clear here – discomfort is a gateway to wisdom when done right.  Holding multiple experiences simultaneously can be a deep experience.  

 

Confusion, Code Switching, varying perspectives, discomfort are all “grist for the mill” of our practice.  The path is not supposed to be easy for those of us who want to experience true reality and not live in a dream world.  There is constant work and when we thing we have nailed it down – the rug is pulled out and we have to start again and again.  As a capping statement, Tesshin reminded us not to depend on uncertainty as a permanent thing either!  When we think everything is relative and uncertain – the world bonks us on the head with simple common sense!  There is no relativity when sticking your finger in an electrical socket!!

 

Tesshin wrapped up his talk with an assignment for the group.  While meditating this week he asked us to look at ourselves deeply in the mirror.  After you do that for a few minutes, try to imagine other people’s perspective of you.  Do not intellectualize this.  It is now what they think of you, but rather what they feel about you or how they ‘experience’ you.  Some examples to consider …

•What is your parent’s perspective? 

•How does your spouse/partner experience you?

•What feelings do you invoke in children? (yours or others)

•What is your effect on neighbors?

•How do you make co-workers, bosses, and clients feel?

•If your pet could speak, what would they say about you?  (That tail wag speaks volumes!!)

 

Tesshin cautioned us that there are people who like us and do not like us – taste the perspective of them all.  Sometimes an adversary can teach us much more than a friend!  You are doing this exercise well if you become uncomfortable!